Sale

Sale…

Sales all around,
of brands, of glitter, of how much can you show off,
the cacaphony of a millennial dream,
of a new generation as superficial as the old one.
Polished glasses, chiselled floors,
of the High ceilings, and the artificial lores,
sale it is, all around us.

As a lost kid in the fair at my village playground,
and as a lost kid in the capital city of my country,
I am still me,
20 years but me unchanged, unsold.
– Nayani

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failure

1 am solitary walk down the familiar solitary roads,
at 9 degree celcius and
an overcoming silence all around…
makes one think that maybe despite everything,
life isn’t that bad.
You can still love without being loved back,
you can still feel despite all the numbness,
You can still think and speak aloud despite not being heard and often being misunderstood,
You still want to hope despite
knowing you have nothing to live for,
and that your heart still beats
to keep you alive,
You can still smile with tears in your eyes…
and that makes me believe
No one is a failure, no one can ever be.
– Nayani

“just another attention hungry whore…!”

“just another attention hungry whore…!”

Damn it, you say,
what’s wrong with you, have you no manners,
that is so not how you get their attention!
Don’t throw around your truths like badges of honour,
don’t speak of honesty like a merit you earned.
Nobody wants to listen to you.

Instead, try this,
flip your hair a bit more haughtily,
paint your face with lies, and a lil more of that fake smile,
agree to people no matter what they say,
you can always gossip on the behind,
but in front, stay perfect!
Work, memorize, accept the rules,
it’s more fun pretending to be a rebel
than to be a one.

You see, its the painted faces that steals hearts,
it’s the polished make-believe world that everyone wants to be a part of,
your education makes sense only if you have that high package in your pocket,
and well, tears suit only those who issues are ‘real’.
Everyone wants the sunshine,
the rains just makes your shoes muddy.

Now, is your lesson done?
Try doing it the way it should be done,
maybe you will fit better,
and just maybe, it will feel better.
– Nayani

…….

अपने औकात का एहसास होना बहुत बड़ी बात होती है,
और जिसे हम यह एहसास कराने का हक़ देते हैं
उनके नजरों में हमारी कोई औकात नहीं होती है।

– जिंदगी ने पिछले कुछ महीनों में बहुत कुछ सीखाया,
बस अपने आप को इन तुच्छ भावनाओं से खिलवाड़ करने से न रोक पाया। खैर छोड़िए, हम जैसे अस्तित्वहीन लोगों को शिकायत करने का भी हक कहां है?

Where does a girl like me go?

Where does a girl like me go?

A girl like  me…yes, I exist

Tumbling over life, one day at a time

Spilling truths like an innocent toddler

Who barely ever learns to walk

Seeking love and attention from faces unknown

A gentle nudge drives me over the edge

A random smile lights up the day

I don’t know how I live on the extremes.

 

I get up, I dress up,

I hold on, I still do my work,

While a lust for life gnaws me from within,

You can’t hear my voice,

Unaware of my chaos

You see me as a sad little face

One with a rare happy smile

And eyes that once lured a thousand more like you.

But now it’s all gone.

 

So tell me,

Where does a girl like me go…

To a house that that was never mine to call home,

To a heart that was never there,

To a world where only money rules,

Or back to the imaginary world of fiction that kept her insanity in check?

You, you have no answers either,

After all how can a lost soul answer another?

 

If only escapism came as easy to me as you.